February 16, 2017

Brilliant Canadian idea for libs (possibly my last post here)

This is just brilliant:

The Canadian Minister of Defence has a dead-on sense of humor

Adopt A Terrorist -This is BRILLIANT ! ‘


Adopt a Terrorist.- Too Good to Miss. The Canadians know how to handle complaints. Here is an example.
A Canadian female liberal wrote a lot of letters to the Canadian government, complaining about the treatment of captive insurgents (terrorists) being held in Afghanistan National Correctional System facilities. She demanded a response to her letter.

She received back the following reply:

National Defence Headquarters
M Gen George R. Pearkes Bldg., 15 NT
101 Colonel By Drive
Ottawa , ON K1A 0K2

Dear Concerned Citizen,

Thank you for your recent letter expressing your profound concern of treatment of the Taliban and Al Qaeda terrorists captured by Canadian Forces, who were subsequently transferred to the Afghanistan Government and are currently being held by Afghan officials in Afghanistan National Correctional System facilities.

Our administration takes these matters seriously and your opinions were heard loud and clear here in Ottawa .. You will be pleased to learn, thanks to the concerns of citizens like yourself, we are creating a new department here at the Department of National Defence, to be called ‘Liberals Accept Responsibility for Killers’ program, or L.A.R.K. for short.

In accordance with the guidelines of this new program, we have decided, on a trial basis, to divert several terrorists and place them in homes of concerned citizens such as yourself, around the country, under those citizens personal care. Your personal detainee has been selected and is scheduled for transportation under heavily armed guard to your residence in Toronto next Monday.

Ali Mohammed Ahmed bin Mahmud is your detainee, and is to be cared for pursuant to the standards you personally demanded in your letter of complaint. You will be pleased to know that we will conduct weekly inspections to ensure that your standards of care for Ahmed are commensurate with your recommendations.
Although Ahmed is a sociopath and extremely violent, we hope that your sensitivity to what you described as his ‘attitudinal problem’ will help him overcome those character flaws. Perhaps you are correct in describing these problems as mere cultural differences. We understand that you plan to offer counseling and home schooling, however, we strongly recommend that you hire some assistant caretakers.
Please advise any Jewish friends, neighbours or relatives about your house guest, as he might get agitated or even violent, but we are sure you can reason with him. He is also expert at making a wide variety of explosive devices from common household products, so you may wish to keep those items locked up, unless in your opinion, this might offend him. Your adopted terrorist is extremely proficient in hand-to-hand combat and can extinguish human life with such simple items as a pencil or nail clippers. We advise that you do not ask him to demonstrate these skills either in your home or wherever you choose to take him while helping him adjust to life in our country.

Ahmed will not wish to interact with you or your daughters except sexually, since he views females as a form of property, thereby having no rights, including refusal of his sexual demands. This is a particularly sensitive subject for him.

You also should know that he has shown violent tendencies around women who fail to comply with the dress code that he will recommend as more appropriate attire. I’m sure you will come to enjoy the anonymity offered by the burka over time. Just remember that it is all part of respecting his culture and religious beliefs’ as described in your letter.

You take good care of Ahmed and remember that we will try to have a counsellor available to help you over any difficulties you encounter while Ahmed is adjusting to Canadian culture.

Thanks again for your concern. We truly appreciate it when folks like you keep us informed of the proper way to do our job and care for our fellow man. Good luck and God bless you.

Gordon O’Connor
Minister of National Defence

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January 13, 2017

I thought of the perfect song for Trump’s inauguration

Listen/watch here. Somebody get me Alec Baldwin on the phone.

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November 14, 2016

No matter what you think of the election/politics…

CATAGORIES: 2016 Presidential Election,FEEL GOOD STORIES,HUMOR,Trumpology — FloridaBill @ 11:54 am

These are pretty funny. Who knew Biden had such a sense of comedy?

October 13, 2016

A joke that made me LOL

CATAGORIES: 2016 Presidential Election — FloridaBill @ 7:50 am

So, Donald Trump and Hilleroid Clinton are stranded together in a lifeboat in the ocean. Who survives?


September 10, 2016


Here is a new one for those of you who are left…

September 6, 2016

breaking: hillary didn’t know the big ‘c’ at the top of emails meant classified

Her majesty stopped coughing long enough to give some incredibly dubious statements to the FBI. They were nice enough to wait for a holiday weekend news dump to release this, but it’s pretty damning stuff. 39 times she didn’t recall various things, much of which she blamed on everything from concussions to staffers to Colin Powell. Instead of having 2 blackberries as she told us many times, she had thirteen…and five Ipads, many of which were smashed by state department employees with a hammer when the email story first came to light. So the big question of the day is, what did the big ‘C’ on those emails stand for in Hillary’s world? This is the qualified candidate, right? 😆


May 4, 2016

Trump wins IN and is the presumptive nominee

CATAGORIES: 2016 Presidential Election — FloridaBill @ 7:25 am

Adios Ted Cruz. He punched and elbowed his wife after dropping out. He now joins the ranks of Scott Walker, Rick Santorum, Marco Rubio, Rand Paul, Rick Perry, George Pataki, Bobby Jindal, Mike Huckabee, Lindsey Graham, John Gilmore, Carly Fiorina (VEEP running-mate for less than a week!), Chris Christie, Ben Carson and Jeb Bush as casual observers. John Kasich is officially still in it, but only by the skin on his teeth.. Christie is looking like he might be Trump’s running mate.

Now the real election/campaign can begin. It is Trump vs. Hillaroid. May the Fourth be with us!

April 15, 2016

Abbott and Costello discuss Unemployment

CATAGORIES: 2016 Presidential Election — FloridaBill @ 7:26 am

COSTELLO: I want to talk about the unemployment rate in America.

ABBOTT: Good Subject. Terrible Times. It’s 5.6%.

COSTELLO: That many people are out of work?

ABBOTT: No, that’s 23%.

COSTELLO: You just said 5.6%.

ABBOTT: 5.6% Unemployed.

COSTELLO: Right 5.6% out of work.

ABBOTT: No, that’s 23%.

COSTELLO: Okay, so it’s 23% unemployed.

ABBOTT: No, that’s 5.6%.

COSTELLO: WAIT A MINUTE. Is it 5.6% or 23%?

ABBOTT: 5.6% are unemployed. 23% are out of work.

COSTELLO: If you are out of work you are unemployed.

ABBOTT: No, Obama said you can’t count the “Out of Work” as the unemployed. You have to look for work to be unemployed.


ABBOTT: No, you miss his point.

COSTELLO: What point?

ABBOTT: Someone who doesn’t look for work can’t be counted with those who look for work. It wouldn’t be fair.

COSTELLO: To whom?

ABBOTT: The unemployed.

COSTELLO: But ALL of them are out of work.

ABBOTT: No, the unemployed are actively looking for work. Those who are out of work gave up looking and if you give up, you are no longer in the ranks of the unemployed.

COSTELLO: So if you’re off the unemployment roles that would count as less unemployment?

ABBOTT: Unemployment would go down. Absolutely!

COSTELLO: The unemployment just goes down because you don’t look for work?

ABBOTT: Absolutely it goes down. That’s how it gets to 5.6%. Otherwise it would be 23%.

COSTELLO: Wait, I got a question for you. That means there are two ways to bring down the unemployment number?

ABBOTT: Two ways is correct.

COSTELLO: Unemployment can go down if someone gets a job?

ABBOTT: Correct.

COSTELLO: And unemployment can also go down if you stop looking for a job?

ABBOTT: Bingo.

COSTELLO: So there are two ways to bring unemployment down, and the easier of the two is to have people stop looking for work.

ABBOTT: Now you’re thinking like a Democrat.

COSTELLO: I don’t even know what the hell I just said!

ABBOTT: Now you’re thinking like Hillary.

March 16, 2016

Super Tuesday III – Trump and Clinton prevail

CATAGORIES: 2016 Presidential Election — FloridaBill @ 10:29 am

And the day afterwards, President Obama nominated his choice to replace Antonin Scalia on the SCOTUS. Merrick somebody or other.

Kasich carried Ohio which was needed for a contested convention. If Cruz can suck enough delegates away from Trump, this may prove inevitable. Rubio finally met his fate in Florida where Trump smoked him. He has suspended his campaign and will save the money for another four years.

Mrs. Clinton has, for all intents and purposes, won the nom for the Dems. Bernie is all but done.

the only real questions left are who are the VEEP candidates?

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