January 11, 2008

Week in Review

CATAGORIES: WEEK IN REVIEW — FloridaBill @ 8:54 am

File under: Week 2 of 2008
Alone in his tiny plastic sea kayak marine biologist Trey Snow had hoped to stealthily track a great white shark. But he had the shock of his life when he spotted a giant fin and realized it was he who was being stalked by surely one of the most feared killers in the world. Better him than us, eh? I like to fish, but that would just freak me right out.

Nominations for Fucktard of the Week:
This unnamed gentleman who cut off his hand then microwaved it before calling the cops.
33 year old Banita Jacks of Washington DC who claimed that her four daughters were possessed, so she killed them.
Christopher Lee McCuin of Texas. Just yuck. Don’t hit the link if you don’t have a strong stomach. Suffice is to say that it appears he killed and was going to eat (if he didn’t eat some of her already) his girlfriend.
Gary Michael Hilton who appears to have killed the missing hiker, Meredith Emerson, in GA. He DID lead authorities to her body after all. Could he be a serial killer?
Pennsylvannia’s Roy Chamberlain who allegedly raped the same woman 200 times. I can’t even begin to fathom the problems those two must have.
Roger Clemons or Brian McNamee? You decide who gets this nomination. Clemons has certainly gone on the offense and has a point about HGH not making anyone a better pitcher. I want to believe him, I really do!
Just exactly WTF is wrong with this man?
The aptly named Bryan Scott Moron is another nominee. Nuff said.
Lam Luong of Bayou La Batre, AL who tossed his four kids off a bridge spanning Mobile Bay. How could he? I would volunteer to throw his sorry ass from the same bridge and feed him to that shark above. That would be justice.

I thought this post, put up after the death of blogger Andrew Olmsted, was powerful stuff. RIP Maj. Olmsted and thank you for your service and sacrifice. I am beginning work on my auto-obit for the blog now and suggest you all do the same, just in case.

As for headlines this week, I think Confucius must have written this one.

This headline nearly made me ill.

Whaddya think about this story about Cigna allegedly killing this transplant patient? I’d be very interested on Feste’s take on this story.

Or how about this boy scout who grabbed a knife and saved the leader of the Maldives. I didn’t know the Maldives had a leader.

Or this Polish couple that ran into each other at a brothel. What luck!

Or this story about someone requesting $3,014,170,389,176,410 (that’s over three quadrillion dollars, more than three times the GNP for this entire country) for hurricane relief. That isn’t relief, that is robbery (or at least attempted fraud). I bet their real claims don’t add up with any more than one comma. Bastards.

The weather was weird this week with record high temps (two days in a row we hit a new high of 64 f) in the Chicago area that touched off Thunderboomers on Monday night.

Sir Edmund Hillary, the first (or perhaps second, if you count sherpas) dude to get to the top of Mount Everest, died; he was 88.

LSU won the National College Football Championship on Monday. I think it was also the longest college football game ever. At least it felt that way. They proved, once again, that the SEC is still the best conference. College ball really needs to move to the NFL method of time-outs on first downs only in the last two minutes and speed up the games.


In politics, John McCain and Hilleroid won New Hampshire. Here is what I want to know: why is his face lopsided? He seems have some kind of bulge on the left side of his face. Maybe a really bad case of TMJ? Some sort of post-prisoner of war disease? Did anyone see his post-victory speech? If so, please let us have your thoughts. Mine are: please don’t read to us Uncle Johnnie Mack. And it appears Hilleroids crying got her some votes in New Hampshire. That ain’t gonna work in South Carolina or Michigan Mrs. C.

Happy healthy weekends to all.

16 responses to “Week in Review”

  1. Trench says:

    I’m going to go with girlfriend eater for FOTW but Alabama bridge guy is a close second.

    Even Hillary’s Sherpa guide said Hillary was the first to reach the peak of Everest.

  2. Yarbz says:

    That’s a great shot of the shark following the dumbass.

    There’s a whole lotta options for FTOTW but I have to give it to the possible serial killer who beheaded those girls. The hand-nuker only harmed himself… I bet there was a pretty good stench in his kitchen.

    Very sad about Andrew Olmstead.

    Pants and knives should not be mixed.

    Clinton will not survive the campaign. She is a monkey in a jungle of starved natives with a love of monkey meat.

    I read the article on CIGNA and the story is not as clear cut as the media wanted to make it…

    But it was only the President of the Maldives. Isn’t that kinda like saving the life of a third string field goal kicker? Still, the scout is a good kid.

    I read the brothel story and it reminded me of the Clinton’s for some reason…

    When I read the story on the levy lawsuits, I wanted to go buy a big gun… That quadrillion suit is just one example but you can bet that these suits are 99.9% bullshit and we ought to prosecute the folks who filed them. If not prosecute, execute.

    The weather is just bored and trying to change its ways.

    Sir Edmund Hillary was one of a kind and will be remembered with the likes of Lewis and Clark etc.

    College football is useless until they get an 8-team playoff. I think it’s really sad.

    Hillary manufactured voters from her own crap and vomit.

  3. FloridaBill says:

    Yarbz, as usual, thank you for the point by point commentary. I am glad someone looks at these links and comments. Trench is always good about a comment as well and I thank him for his attention and time as well.

    Now, I want the rest of you to comment at will.

    Does no one know why John McCain’s face is lopsided?

  4. FloridaBill says:

    I wonder if the guy in the kayak is hearing that Bum-bum bum-bum music from “Jaws”?

  5. Trench says:

    Does no one know why John McCain’s face is lopsided?

    Isn’t he like 200 and fought in the civil war?

  6. Yarbz says:

    It’s those damn VietCong!~

  7. Gary Farber says:

    Olmsted. Not “Olmstead.”

    For more on Andrew, see here, here, and here.

  8. DaneBramage says:

    I guess Billy stands corrected and erect. On the Cigna thing, isn’t that the entire purpose of the bureaucratic process in insurance companies (really HMOs too) and huge cost procedures. They are betting you’ll die before they have to dole out any cash.

  9. DaneBramage says:

    “They proved, once again, that the SEC is still the best conference.”

    We knew that all along didn’t we Bill?

  10. Yarbz says:

    As long as they don’t speed you along…

  11. Yarbz says:

    SEC: Short Erection is Comical…

  12. FloridaBill says:

    Apologies to Gary Farber and Maj Olmsted for the unintentional misspelling of Olmsted’s name. I have fixed. Thanks to Gary for supplying more links about Maj. Olmsted as well. I wish I had known him and truly appreciate his service and sacrifice and that of his family. Thanks to Gary Farber for stopping by Juggernuts and correcting me. Please visit regularly and correct me as needed.

    And yes, Dane, we knew that all along. It will continue to be so for the forseeable future.

  13. DaneBramage says:

    No doubt about it.

  14. FloridaBill says:

    If you have not visited some of the links that Gary Farber supplied, you should at least see the third one, even though we were not mentioned (yet). Gary has honored Maj. Olmsted in a manner that wouldn’t even have been possible a few years ago. Well done.

    As far as the Cigna story, I don’t think insurance companies intentionally try to avoid obligations, just balance those against their desire to make money. That decision was not an easy one, I am certain. When an insurance company is faced with an “experimental” treatment, they often stumble. Utilization review is hard to fathom sometimes and I have had many battles with my own insurance company (it took me six years to get Aetna to approve an MRI on my back).

  15. cj says:

    My sympathies to the family and friends of Maj. Olmsted. He was obviously a remarkable man. Thank you for your service sir. Rest in peace.

    FB, I read your WIRs every Friday if time allows. I don’t comment sometimes due to time, but I appreciate your efforts. You keep me informed sometimes. Life is fast. I love the heading picture and would like it framed on my wall.

    The FTOW is the man who threw the children off the bridge. He should be hung by a rope and dipped every two seconds into the river for a period of two minutes. After ten minutes of doing this he should be fully dunked and a party should ensue. Die you horrible man. Oooops.. I have an anger problem today.

  16. FloridaBill says:

    cj: Thank you for the nice comments.